Trust

I think that trust is the number one, most important characteristic in any relationship. Whether with a lover, a spouse, a child, a parent, a friend, even our pets. Without trust we have nothing, nothing to hang on to. There may be strings tossed here or there, but there isn't a rope to hang on to.

When trust is broken I think it takes a very, very long time to get over, if someone is ever able to get over broken trust. It also takes a lot of effort, a lot of reassurance, a lot of flat out honesty, humility and other unpleasant things that the one that broke trust may not want to take part in.

Trust is not something that can just come and go, and the security that goes along with it is even harder to get back when it's lost. This is the reason that sometimes we must be brutally honest with those we are closest to, they say what you don't know can't hurt you ... that may have moments when it's true ... but sometimes what is best for everyone involved is brutal honesty. Being lied to hurts way more than hearing even the most hurtful things.

This is true when a parent breaks our trust, when our children break our trust, when a friend does or even a significant other. There aren't many truths that will hurt more than knowing you've been lied to, deceived, tricked ... that your views of a person or of a relationship are completely based on lies ...