I think in life often times people confuse these two areas ...
I've seen it a few times recently ...
When you say and do things completely unprovoked, without someone opening that door for you, I think that makes you an offensive person ... this can lead to good things in places like Corporate America ... but when it comes to friendships and relationships there is a whole different story ... I think that's my definition of bully ... someone that does and says hurtful things unprovoked ... when the person they're doing them to, has caused them no harm .... that kind of offensiveness ... is in my honest opinion ... wrong ... it's the opposite of all things good ... it lacks compassion ... and an understanding of humanity ....
On the flip side ...
When someone wrongs you ... or people you love (especially your children) ... and you defend yourself or them ... that is natural and noble .... there is a line where it can be too much and that is a line I have crossed more than once in my life ... but when someone actually does something wrong to you ... something that hurts you (emotionally, physically, or any other way) or your loved ones ... I think that defending yourself & them is an appropriate reaction ...
I think sometimes those on the "offensive" side forget that ... they forget that the person they were hurtful toward did nothing to harm them in the first place ... I mean people can rub you the wrong way ... people might annoy you or many other things .... but if they don't actually do anything to hurt you ... there is no justification for hurting them ...
I do have the problem of taking bait ... and I do have the problem of thinking I can fix and change people and make them understand how wrong hurting someone else is ... but I do eventually give up ... because some people just will never realize how hurtful they can be ... whether they don't know or don't care is another story ...but it is still wrong that they continually hurt people with their actions and words and take no responsibility for it ... and that is something I will just have to learn how to accept ... that some people are just like that ...
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Saturday, March 12, 2011
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